So while I only intended to take a short break to deal with all the crazy that comes with the end of the year, it bizarrely turned into going completely off the grid.
At first it made sense, I had decided to re-do my cowl to get it just the way I liked, and there wasn’t much going on to post about. Then about a week or so after my last post, I went to get my leg checked – with my hopes up into the stratosphere about getting to hit the pool – can you see where this is going?
Yup, I’m still in the boot.
The bones healed beautifully, as did the joint, but it turns out that because of all of what was going on, they didn’t catch that I had some tendon damage and now, it’s all about rehabing that back up to shape – both to try and avoid surgery and to get my foot in shape enough to have surgery if I do end up needing it.
It was beyond frustrating and sent me back to the same desolate emotions-hellscape where I ended up when I was first injured. I realized that I was going to get to the end of the year that I hadn’t completed my fitness goals and what really hit me hard, is that I hadn’t completed much in the way of projects. There was other stuff going on in terms of dealing with PTSD and I just couldn’t snap out of the funk I was in.
This time I turned things around a bit more slowly. I came across this amazing picture from TheSweatyKnitter and discovered that it consistently made me smile. I’m not much one for pink, but this blanket looked like all the love in the world crocheted into one place that I saved a copy to my phone so that I could look at it when I was feeling low.
About a week later, I watched a bunch of tutorials on granny squares and basically re-learned how to crochet. In the space of a few minutes, I had a granny square! It felt amazing to finish something – it was a granny square, simple and delightful on its own. I took to making them to cheer me up, after panic attacks, to calm down after a nightmare or just when I got overwhelmed. And best of all, I was doing this with the acrylic yarn I’m trying to use up. After a good thirteen squares, I had a sort of theme going and I decided to scrap the idea of knitting a blanket to learn different stitches, and just go for crocheting granny squares.
This turned into a treasure hunt of sorts. I tracked down every scrap of orange and grey I had and got to work. I think I cleared about a fifth of The Yarn Bin – and then I promptly ran out of yarn. The missus, who was super amped about this project, decided to take me to JoAnns to get black yarn to join up the squares and stitch a border on our way for a week in Monterey. And that’s where it hit me: I’m not insane. All the yarns I’d been working with were acrylic AND worsted weight but they were all different – and it wasn’t just me getting random yarns, we lined up 12 different kinds of Black worsted weight yarn – all the same material and they were all completely different in terms of thickness, actual weight, feel – everything. For this blanket it wasn’t a big deal – it is a scrap blanket and the differences make it all the more cozy but if I was working on something for which I needed a really consistent fabric, I’d be screwed. All the more reason not to stash and buy yarn as needed for the project – and to quintruple check that I get all the yarn I need in the first go because if 2015 has taught me anything is that things will sell out/get discontinued or end up with a lot of variation.
I know I should have probably blocked the squares before putting them together but that was a tall order while on vacation, so I just stitched them together, and added the border so that we could curl up with it tonight – because holy-climate change it’s cold here! Well for Oakland anyway. Nights have been in the low 30F…. *shivers*
I’m tempted to block it now but I’m not sure if that would do it any good…. What do you all think?
I’ve given myself a clean slate for 2016 in terms of projects because I’d like to go back to being a more one-project-at-a-time kind of crafter but I do have a goal of making my own tops so there is plenty on deck to blog about and this absolutely means I’m back 😀
Have a safe and wonderful – and safe time welcoming in the 2016! Hugs to you all!